New shows on this week’s Trashy TV Recap!

Since Top Chef Just Desserts and Project Runway ended last week I thought I’d be all sad and lonely with only America’s Next Top Model to keep me entertained. But nooooope. Two new shows started and I’m thinking they might be winners.

But first! I can’t believe I forgot to mention Mad Fashion last week! Well, that mistake won’t happen again. This week Chris was asked to make a headdress for a charity competition.

Chris make a headdress? Oh, hello! That’s perfect for him. The only catch? He has to work with a floral designer since the charity is Tulips and Pansies. Well, Chis isn’t much for working with other designers, he prefers to be a one-man machine.

They ended up chucking their first design out the window (literally, almost hitting some poor girl walking down the sidewalk). I wonder if she kept telling people, ‘I almost got crushed by a six-foot tulip!’

After they ditched the first outfit, Chris made this slinky floral gown thing that goes more with the headdress. Which, after all, is the focus here. Chris wants it to be tall. Taller than anything he’s ever made and he’s got this old fishing pole he’s been saving for just such a piece of art. Wait a minute. Did I just say ‘fishing pole’? Why yes, yes I did.

The floral designer changed around the design of the headdress as well, not letting Chris know until the day of the competition and, well, that didn’t make Chris a happy boy. They didn’t win, but it was for charity, so that makes it okay. Right? Um, Chris doesn’t think so. I’m sure next week he’ll be back to designing his own fashions without the help of a florist.

First new show of the week! The Next Iron Chef: Super Chefs

Okay, I’ll be the first to admit that I get a little twitchy with too many cooking shows, but TNIC:SC has too many of my favorite chefs not to watch. So, with notebook in hand, I sat down to see if this show could hold my attention for more than two episodes.

Alton Brown (full disclosure here – AB annoys the heck out of me) meets up with the chefs and explains there will be two challenges for every show. A Chairman’s Challenge and a Sudden Death mini-challenge that will decide who goes home. The bottom two of the CC will have to compete in the sudden death match. Okay, fair enough.

Then the chefs are paired up by Spike. Wait a minute! I know Spike, he was on Top Chef. And didn’t win. Why is he here with super chefs?

Yeah, I’m still scratching my head on that one. Anyway, Spike gets to pair everyone up and he picks his idol, Chef Marcus Samuelsson. Another full disclosure – I love, love, love Marcus. When he won Top Chef Masters, I did a happy dance around my living room. He has a quiet confidence that exudes style and class. Love him.

 

Right. So, now that the chefs are all paired up, they’re taken to the wild and told to make a fire, butcher a whole pig, and make two gourmet dishes for the judges.

I know what I would’ve told Alton Brown, but don’t you know, not a single person said what I was thinking. That’s probably why they’re on the show and I’m not.

These guys really are super chefs. They somehow managed to make delicious meals out of a very limited pantry and whatever they could find around them. Spike and Marcus used lake water to make a soup, Chef Chiarello ran out into a meadow and picked dandelions for a salad. I mean, wow. I would’ve still been curled in the fetal position muttering nursery rhymes in Gaelic. No, I don’t actually speak Gaelic, but that’s how freaked out I would’ve been. My idea of camping is staying in a hotel without room service. For real.

After ninety minutes of cooking, the chefs present their meals to the judges. Most of the dishes are a hit, but a few fall short. Who’s in the Sudden Death Challenge?

Oh, man talk about irony. Spike and Marcus Samuelsson, his idol. They have to battle it out to see who stays.

I’m kind of feeling bad for Spike at this time because he’s got to out cook Marcus. I just don’t know how he’s going to do it.

Well, Spike is a heck of a better chef than I gave him credit. He cooks his scallops to near perfection. Too bad Marcus hit perfection.

Poor Spike goes home. Hey, at least he got to meet his idol and gain his respect. That makes him a winner.

These are the chefs left to battle another day:

Anne Burrell, Robert Irvine, Michael Chiarello, Elizabeth Falkner, Alex Guarnaschelli, Chuck Hughes (I don’t know this guy… better keep an eye on him), Beau MacMillan, and my favorite, Marcus Samuelsson. They all either have shows on Food Network, or have been on Top Chef Masters, so I kind of know what their strengths are. This is going to be interesting…

From the fire to the frivolous ~ here’s what went down on America’s Next Top Model.

The ‘All Stars’ were given the challenge of writing a song and then making a music video.

Okay, really? What does singing have to do with their “brand” and modeling? If a publisher said to me, yeah we really like your book, but you need to write a song and make a music video to go with it, I’d laugh. Then when they heard me sing, they’d laugh and forget all about the idea. I’m pretty much tone deaf and I have no rhythm at all. Seriously.

Oh, wait, what a surprise. Lisa wins the songwriting challenge. Yay. Her prize? Getting to see a loved one. When her fiance shows up, I had to fast-forward through her being all lovey-dovey and kissing him. Ewww.

Ugh! I’m SO over Lisa. She keeps winning and I just don’t get it. Even my son thinks she looks like she’s 80 years old. You know, I do have to love her confidence, though. That girl has it in spades.

The guest judge this week is a rapper they call Game. Apparently he’s got some because Angelea goes berserk when he shows up. Yeah, my son and I don’t know who he is, either and on the second Tuesday of each month we’re pretty hip.

Game directs the girls in their videos and I think he kind of falls in love with Allison. He loves her freaky eyes and keeps telling her she’s so weird. Weirdly beautiful. Um, thanks?

Allison just giggles and tries not to cry. They’re totally going to date when this is all over. I can tell.

Judging this week is based solely on the video ~ which I forgot to mention was hijacked by Tyra and youtube sensation BeenerKeeKee. He’s that guy who lip synchs all the songs of pop artists like Katy Perry.

Anyway! Allison wins the video challenge (and Game’s heart), with Lisa coming in second. I have to admit, Lisa’s video was pretty cool. She should switch careers. Now. All of the videos are on the CWTV site if you want to see them.

The bottom two this week are Angelea and Alexandria. Both gave lackluster performances in their videos, but the judges thought Alexandria’s was just a smidge worse. Buh-bye Alexandria.

Next week the girls fly to Greece! Because, you know, Greece is a mecca for fashion.

If you want to see BeenerKeeKee singing Katy Perry’s ‘Teenage Dream’ click here.

Last, but not least, a new Top Chef started this week. I was on the fence about this show, too. I mean, Top Chef Texas? Will it be all bbqs and steak?

Nope.

Twenty-nine chefs arrive at the Alamo and are told immediately that they will have to fight for a place in the house.

So far, I’m kind of like, Meh. But then… the judges are introduced. This season Padma and Tom Colicchio, together with Gayle Simmons (the judge of Top Chef Just Desserts), are joined by Emeril Lagasse and… Hugh Acheson! O.M.G. If I love Marcus Sameulsson, then I am positively smitten with Hugh Acheson. He was on Top Chef Masters (with Marcus) and is one of the funniest guys I’ve ever watched on TV. Seriously. He’s got this unibrow and is always making fun of it. Hilarious. And he’s a darn good chef.

Alright, I’m in. Get on with the competition.

The chefs are broken up into three groups who have to basically have quickfire challenges to determine who stays, who goes, and who is on the bubble.

There’s this one guy – Tyler Stone – cocky S.O.B. who explains that people always think he’s arrogant when really he’s just confident.

Hmmm, telling us you’re so amazing because you wrote a cookbook in 3 1/2 weeks is arrogant. Get off my TV you arrogant little punk.

Oh, wait a minute! I don’t have to tell him that because Tom Colicchio just did! Rewind… yep, arrogant boy didn’t know how to butcher a pig. Here’s a video of him begging Tom to let him stay. Love it! He didn’t even get a chance to cook!

Only two of the three groups made their dishes this episode, so we don’t know who all the chefs will be, but of the ones in the house, Nyesha is my favorite. She made this delicious-looking Tex-Mex ravioli that I’m still craving. Must. Find. Recipe. Oh, wait, I don’t know how to make ravioli. Dang it!

Since the episode sort of ended without any real conclusion, so will I. Next week we get the final five chefs. Until then my sweets, be trashy!

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4 thoughts on “New shows on this week’s Trashy TV Recap!

  1. I think I’m going to love Next Iron Chef, just because I feel like I know so many of these people. Spike’s been a contestant on Iron Chef – I think he battled Michael Simon. He lost. He also didn’t think his strategy through – yes, you could give yourself an advantage if you think Marcus is that much better than everyone else BUT if you lose, you have to battle the guy! Seems like everyone he paired rose above his expectations. Jeffrey Z. and Beau got along great, Anne and Robert were a good team. I was surprised how the pressure got to Alex – she might be the next one out if she can’t roll with the punches. The interesting thing with this show is that I see these chefs being able to truly collaborate for team challenges, as opposed to the batch o’babies we’ve got in Top Chef Texas.

    I was SO happy when Tyler got kicked out, before even COOKING! He’s an IDIOT! I suspect he’ll get another 15 minutes of fame somewhere. He’s too much of a joke to pass up. Man, those judges were harsh. Can’t butcher? Get out. Can’t get the soup IN the bowl? Get out. Food doesn’t taste quite as good as the guy next to you? Okay, we’ll give you a second chance. Put on this metal and leather outfit and get yourself to the arena. We’re giving you a steak and releasing five half-starved lions. Cook something in 20 minutes they like and we’ll let you on the show.

    I know you didn’t mention it, but I am kind of digging Project Accessory. Their mentor (don’t ask me to remember any names – I didn’t take notes) is NOT Tim Gunn, but the contestants are the same kind of fashion divas as PR, only they’re given hammers, pliers, blowtorches and plastic. They had to make shoes last night, for Pete’s sake!

    • I’m not watching Project Accessory, I don’t know why, but it just didn’t appeal to me. I might have to check out an episode.

      This morning in my DVR there was a Tim Gunn, behind the seams show. It was pretty cute – showing clips from the last season.

      Your take on the chefs on the bubble is great! That’s exactly what it’s like for them, I bet.

      My friend is totally loving Alex on NIC, but I don’t know. She did freak out a lot. I might have to scale my recap back to just the two shows so I can get more in depth. I had to skim way too much! It was all just so good.

      What do you think of Alton? I don’t know why he bugs me, but he does. Too bossy-know-it-all maybe? I love Michael Simon. He’s hilarious.

  2. Muttering nursery rhymes in Gaelic??? OMG, Tameri, you crack me up! Thanks for all this info on shows I never watch and never have to because I get all the good stuff straight for you. I’m telling you these posts need to be in TV Guide or the NYT!

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